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Where from: Newcastle

Favourite player: Hatem Ben Arfa

Best team moment: When Faustino Asprilla scored a hattrick against Barcelona and when we came from 4-0 behind to draw 4-4 against Arsenal


Timezone: (GMT) Western Europe Time, London, Lisbon, Casablanca

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31 Jan 2014 18:06:47
Just reading that we are now interested in Ravel Morrison and Jack Rodwell, Also saw earlier we could be back in for Remy Cabella, Doubt that Benfica lad will come though.

I would love us to sign someone but its looking more and more unlikely.


1.) Wud love 2 c any1 of them but mark my words we won't n pardew n jokinear will say the squad is strong n we go wit wot we got! absolute joke don't look 4ward 2 deadline day because the only thing that happens is players headin 4 the door! Support the team n not the regime



26 Jan 2014 16:25:44
Ao there's been quite a bit of news today:

We are believed to be interested in £10million rated Clement Grenier from Lyon, He has good skill and is very good and a huge potential. Would like him in but I can't see it happening if we don't sell Cabaye.

PSG have bid £14million for Cabaye, I think they are trying to do what Arsenal did earlier in the season and unsettle him. Would agree anything above £25million. Now let's go annoy them and bid £3m for cavani and ibra.

Also I hope we sell Cisse because it will get Campbell nearer when he comes back and it will get Armstrong closer too. That Aarons guy looks good and I think he will be in the squad in the next few seasons.


1.) I agree anuva blatant attempt 2 unsettle yohan personally I wud'nt sell 2 them for 40mill because of the amount of tyms blanc been in press with his dirty tricks there a mega rich club that's just disrespecting nufc if Mata can sign for mufc for 37mil with no game tym this year then the form yohan has shown this year i'd b tellin them that's the price or jog on u mugs!

2.) Is no way Lyon will sell any of their good players. They are challenging for a champions league qualification.

3.) Here we go again silly season people dreaming again. wake up ashlEy will NOT SPEND MONEY. we might get a loan signing



15 Jan 2014 18:09:38
Nearly died laughing few minutes ago.

Sports direct news are saying Rene Meulensteen are interested in Gabriel Obertan


1.) Probably score against us

2.) I though Fulham were trying to avoid relegation

3.) Wouldn't mind him going out to a club in championship.

4.) Yea fulham



06 Jan 2014 21:14:55
Reports are saying at Newcastle have had a loan bid for Luuk De Jong rejected and his club are holding out for a sale. Newcastle are believed to be preparing to put in a bid to buy the 23 year old striker if talks go well.




06 Jan 2014 14:37:02
Newcastle's chances of Remy Cabella have been boosted today by the news Montpellier have signed a potential replacement. I really hope we get this guy and a new striker.


1.) Cabella really looks like a flair midfielder, who can change the game on his own. Hopefully we can get him for around the 10million mark, that's if ashley pays up.




ToonMatt's banter posts with other poster's replies to ToonMatt's banter posts


18 Sep 2014 19:43:18
Seen as it looks like Pardew is going to be sacked sooner rather then later, these are the people i would replace him with who are WITHOUT A JOB:
-Frank Rijkaard
-Marco Van Basten
-Rudi Völler
-Roberto Di Matteo
-Johan Cryuff
-Walter Smith
-David Moyes

These are some with a job that I would like and its not unreasonable:
-Marcelo Bielsa
-Eddie Howe

Here are the ones being linked:
-Steve Bruce
-Christophe Galtier
-Fabricio Coloccini



1.) Really don't think any of Rijkaard, Voller, Cryuff are going to come back into management for us.

I said before and i'll say it again, we need to move along with the times and do what everton and liverpool have done. Appoint a young and dynamic manager who has an attractive style of football. DE BOER, works on tight budget, would massively improve our coaching and youth setup and plays a style of football that we would simply love.

No more dinosaur managers like pardew/moyes/di matteo/bruce/sherwood/pulis

2.) I am inclined to agree Jtoon. I think footballers today need someone who understands them. Fergie and wenger are an exception to the older manage. But they do know how to manage people and get the best out of them.

I had never heard of pochetino until southampton. Maybe if ashley paid an agent fee he could actually get a propper search done and find someone overseas who we haven't heard of.

Can you email Charnley with your list of criteria as it is bang on.

3.) 19 Sep 2014 07:49:59
They could find it a good club if they want to come back into management. People like Cryuff and Rijkaard would get us doing well. Also, Alejandro Sabella ish without a job, he could do well, but I agree partly with you JToon.

4.) We need wake up NO decent manger will come to Newcastle and work for Ashley his appathetic non appreciation of football staff and fans has well and truly seen to that.

Dream by all means but it is not going to happen. Rooted at the bottom by December might just get Ashley off his fat a. e and do something.

5.) 20 Sep 2014 16:45:31
A good read on frank de boer here:

perfect man for ashley

6.) Pardew is going nowhere



17 Sep 2014 17:27:14
Im back on to wish Jonas a speedy and succesful recovery, but if Pardew told him to leave the club it is UNACCEPTABLE.


1.) They told Jonas to go back to argentina for treatment, not to leave the club.

Rather than a protest would it not be more fitting to show support for Jonas at the game instead.

It would be better for Ashley if the fans did protest as it would give the media a field day and not put newcastle fans in the best light.

2.) Agreed, the protest needs to be cancelled for a show of support for Jonas. all those saying the club doesn't care about Jonas, well we're not showing much love for him either unless we have a show of support. Just like Villa did for Petrov.

It's times like these that a show of support might just spur the team on to do their best (even if most of them don't know Jonas).

3.) Well said geordie toon.



25 Apr 2014 18:42:12
Not newcastle related but its so sad the news I just read, former Barcelona boss Tito Vilanova has lost his battle with cancer and has passed away. No one deserves to die that young!




17 Apr 2014 11:46:44
So, i'm off to the match this week em and all match I will be chanting pardew out and stuff like that. AP doesn't deserve a PL job, he has ruined most of our players. Here are some of them:
Pappis Cisse
Hatem Ben Arfa
Yanga M'biwa

Also, youngsters will be breaking into the first team over the next season and these could include Adam Armstrong, Adam Campbell, Rolando Aarons, Lubo Satka, Freddie Woodman and so on. Will these get 'Pardewed' too if he is still manager. The answer would probably be yes.

In my opinion there are a few managers who are out of jobs and ones who may come who are a lot better then AP. Here are a small list of them:

-Marcelo Bielsa (In talks with marseille but is known for a mad man, but not like felix magaths training. )

-Frank Rijkaard (He is taking a break but this was the manager who laid the foundations at Barcelona, he rejected us in the past. )

-Johan Cryuff (Yes, he is probably retired but imagine what he could do with us!)

-Roberto Di Matteo (Wasnt given the time at Chelsea, won the UCL and the FA cup. He also did good jobs at WBA and MK dons, he is better then pardew with premier league experience. )

-Walter Smith (Yes, he's retired too but he would still be a bit better then Pardew despite his Tony Pulis style. )

-Avram grant (He would do a better job too! he was decent at west ham as they were already going down. Same with Portsmouth and he did a good job at Chelski. )

-Eddie Howe (Done a good job in the championship with Burnley and Bournemouth. )

-Sean Dyche (Done a very good job at Burnley. (Ginger Mourinho) )

-Maybe Jose Riga but wait and see how he does at charlton. Had a good start.

Pardew Out.


1.) Nice to see your back matt.

Bielsa is the only one i'd take from there. Laudrup for me, he would transform us, I think his bargain buys would go well with ashley.

Take a banner saying pardew out maybe, hopefully other people already are.

And yes I agree with you, I fear that the longer pardew remains in charge, I don't think we'll ever see any ginola/ben arfa type players again, we will only see grafters, so in pardew terms that's Jonas Gutierrez.

Armstrong already been Pardewed, he was played as a right mid against stoke.

I hate it when there are articles out saying "Ben arfa fighting to save his career at newcastle" because its not his fault, its pardew's because he just doesn't know how to manage luxury players like ben arfa, as he proved at west ham with tevez and mascherano.

2.) Nice to see u again too JT.

I would like to see any of them. They're all better then AP.
i missed out Koeman, Laudrup, Van Basten so they're good too

As strikers I hope we sign are:
Bafetimbi Gomis-Free
Alexandre Lacazette-£7m
Emmanuel Rivière-£9m
Aaron Hunt-Free
Tom Ince-£3m (ish)

Team for Saturday I think will be:

I hope Pardew drops Gouffran for Ben Arfa or Marveaux or Cisse/Armstrong depending on who is in the middle.

{Ed007's Note - Everybody and their granny seem to want Laudrup as manager and see him as some kind of footballing Messiah, he is actually quite the opposite, he left Swansea in a hell of a mess and his attitude stunk up the place.
There were a lot of problems behind the scenes at Swansea and most of them stemmed from Laudrup himself and some of his ideas and methods. He was sacked after taking an unauthorised personal trip to France and giving players two days off after losing to West Ham, an important game in the relegation battle. There was stories of players boozing on trips, he introduced a ruling that a maximum of 3 Spanish players could sit together at any table in the club canteen when they had lunch and on a training camp to Dubai the only rule set out to the players was the time they had to be on the bus to go to a 2 hour training session, the rest of the time they could do what they wanted, you can imagine what a crowd of wealthy footballers would get up to.
Oh and I almost forgot - he refused to take training if it was raining!}

3.) That sounds like utter tosh Ed, he was sacked because of the players they bought in and trying to revamp his back room staff such as getting rid of the likes of Weighorst, Garcia and Larsen!

People think Laudrup as you say the "messiah" because is a quality young manager. Won Swansea their first ever trophy in however many years, beating the likes of Liverpool and Chelsea away from home. Yes they had Bradford in the final but under pardew Newcastle would probably lose to them. Not only did Laudrup carry on their philosophy and style of football, they were a lot more attacking, creating more chances per game and seemed to get the best out of most players, willing to give youths a chance (made Ben Davies into first team quality) and also got some absolute bargains in transfers!

Face it, Laudrup his 10times the manager pardew will ever be. He would suit Newcastle and Geordies with his attractive brand of football and his passion for the game.

At least he doesn't head butt people.

{Ed007's Note - I must be getting mixed up with another Michael Laudrup that managed Swansea until February this year - how silly of me! I'm surprised you know more than people who worked alongside this other Michael Laudrup though.}

4.) Oh so your saying you know exactly what the reason for laudrup being sacked was? ed you speak as if you are laudrup's agent!

{Ed007's Note - The reasons are well documented, it's you that's claiming to know more, not me.}

5.) Oh alright Ed.

6.) Now be careful Ed you are in JToons site here
To be fair to him he only sees what we all see & Ladrup had Swansea playing good football & his legacy will be seen tomorrow possibly another 3-0

7.) Well argued Ed I`ll go with you

8.) We are crap against possession teams, we will get trounced.

9.) Is this true about Laudrup?

{Ed007's Note - Why would I make it up Matt?}

10.) Whatever you say ed, I still want Laudrup or bielsa. We as fans see the product on the pitch, and from watching Laudrup and Bielsa sides, is good free-flowing attacking football, and if it is true what you say about Laudrup ed, why would marseille want him?

{Ed001's Note - Bielsa would be a great choice, the football is magnificent under him. As for Marseille, they want Pochettino, but that looks unlikely, Laudrup is way down their list. Much as I hate to say it, as Michael Laudrup the player is one of my favourites of all time, the manager left a lot to be desired and Ed007 is right (for once) regarding his sacking.}

11.) I heard that bielsa is now set for marseille. If pardew was sacked, who do you think would take over ed?

{Ed002's Note - As you say, Marcelo Bielsa will most probably accept an offer to join l'OM after they did not get any sort of warm response from the other person they approached. As for Alan Pardew, I really don't want to get in to such questions.}



20 Mar 2014 21:19:10
Sorry about not being on recently, Someone I know very closely have lost their battle to cancer and I spent time with them before they died this Monday.

Also, on the happier front, I was happy to see Armstrong make his debut last weekend.


1.) I'm sorry matt : (

And yes I agree about armstrong, i'd like to see Haidara and Bigirimana getting some playing time before the end of the season




ToonMatt's rumour replies


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01 Sep 2014 11:39:11
Mbiwa would be our best centre back in my opinion if we played him for a bit, Curtis Good is still injured after being ruled out of the World Cup.But where are Streete and Mbabu?




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19 Jul 2014 10:54:19
Im back and I agree with this too, I think Janmaat will turn out to be better then Debuchy, he looked good in World Cup too. If we sell Krul or even if we don't we should sign Ochoa. RIP to the 2 fans and everyone else on MH17




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Toon toon howay howay




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We should of given them Shola or cisse lol




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I think we signed De Jong to prepare for cisse leaving.





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19 Sep 2014 07:49:59
They could find it a good club if they want to come back into management. People like Cryuff and Rijkaard would get us doing well. Also, Alejandro Sabella ish without a job, he could do well, but I agree partly with you JToon.




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17 Sep 2014 17:28:28
Get well soon Jonas!




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17 Sep 2014 17:27:42
Get well soon Jonas! there's ONLY ONE JONAS GUTTIEREZ.




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01 Sep 2014 15:09:47
That front 3 looks exciting even though it doesn't have a striker, the other thing is to put Ayoze up top with Rivière and where has Armstrong gone?




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01 Sep 2014 15:08:43
Fully Agree with all of that JToon!